Let's ignore the words about the place that doesn't exist. It's a tangent Albedo wasn't willing to waste time on--not when there was things more detailed, things more important, further up and further in--even when those things are just pointless, because this Rubedo would disappear just like all the rest.
Another time, and Albedo would have hung on his twin's words-- Placed weight on the idly spoken, “We both took the name up,” directed at Nigredo. Leaving Albedo separate once again, once more! This was the type of thing that had been his fuel when they had first come to the institute here--this was the thing that had formed the unnatural, superficial hatred directed at Nigredo. This was the thing that was utterly unreliable, because rather than the bosom buddies that could be gathered from that sentence, Albedo knew for an absolute fact that Nigredo was more lonely than he. And the only thing that was actually provided in that... Was that Rubedo had no knowledge of either of his brother's hearts.
Something Albedo would take a malicious pleasure in revealing.
Of all of them, Albedo was the one who knew best that this Rubedo was not any of the ones they had encountered. Something given through the absolute shock of seeing the two before him, and his reactions to what they had said. Albedo knew more than any. That this one had not committed any of the acts of hatred against them.
He also understood a different truth. That even if everything his twin was telling him was true, that the possibility still remained that Rubedo would end up hating them. Once the possibility had been given, once that side had been shown--once his twin had shown such a willingness to cut him down-- There was nothing that would show him otherwise.
Maybe this Rubedo didn't hate them. Maybe he loved them more than words could describe. It remained, that quite possibly one day, he wouldn't. That he would hate them more strongly than their hearts' combined beating. That he would take it upon himself to shun Nigredo and kill Albedo himself.
His mouth watered in anticipation at the thought, even as his stomach threatened to upheave itself. There was no longer any chance at tears. No longer any chance at anything, and wasn't that what he had learned?!
...Ironically, it was Nigredo that gave Rubedo a chance for redemption with Albedo. Because as Albedo remembered his previous vow to never again trust blood, he became aware once more of Nigredo at his back. At the cancellation of that vow when Albedo began to love Nigredo in full. When Albedo put his faith in Nigredo, that Nigredo would not leave. When Nigredo told him that all he was, everything, was Albedo's to do with as he pleased--and when that statement was given with absolute trust that Albedo would love him rather than harm him.
And Albedo remembered telling Nigredo that one night, that no matter what, Rubedo had once loved them. And this one possibly loved them still.
It changed nothing but everything, but things remained the same. Albedo's emotions were too high, and here was the face of his pain, his undying adoration, his loathing. And even as this one yet walked clean, it was too easy to point a finger at what had been done wrong.
He understood as well. That if Nigredo was not here, this interaction would have gone quite differently. For better or for worse, the youngest had a moderating effect on their behavior. Something he was thankful for as Rubedo came forward, because Albedo could not think of touching his twin. Could not break that careful barrier set between them, because if that was done, everything... Everything in him....
Would just break apart. He knew it. Knew it and flinched when Rubedo stormed up, pressed back against Nigredo, but only as a reaction, because in the next moment, Albedo was leaning forward, voice raising with each breath. "What kind of question is that?" he repeated, mockingly, then continued bitingly. "A valid question, beloved, from what's been shown in the past. Should we put it all behind us; place it to whims and petty indulgences?"
His tones were slipping, sounding melodic more and more, but this was no Song's sweet embrace influencing him, but the sins of the past. "You missed us," he continued without hesitation, snarling out the line. "Then let me tell you how we've been, oh twin of mine. --What happened to the others? Mm? Wasn't that what you wanted to know?"
Here, Albedo gave his first pause, humor and anger both draining from expression, energy being lost along the way. What remained was an expression close to dead, tinged with both apathy and disgust. "There's been four of you, that we encountered, once we came to this world. One was a monster in disguise, and tried to destroy Nigredo by manipulating his heart, playing with his love-- I killed it instead." A smile was given, thin and pointed. "That was the simplest of the interactions we had.
"One could not remember anything true that happened to us, one hated us beyond reckoning, and one ended up being both of those. That one we were with the longest, and he told us his age, told us that he killed Citrine, that he knew of Nigredo's fate--of his mission. That he went on to kill me, to stop my ever-beating heart from continuing another second." A sick look was passing over Albedo's face, but his momentum didn't cease. "That one ignored us, abandoned us, tried to kill me without a second's hesitation. We were worthless, Rubedo."
For the first time, absolute pain registered in Albedo's eyes, and the question put forward, meant as rhetorical, came out as literal instead, pleading. "Are you here to make us feel like that again?"
no subject
Another time, and Albedo would have hung on his twin's words-- Placed weight on the idly spoken, “We both took the name up,” directed at Nigredo. Leaving Albedo separate once again, once more! This was the type of thing that had been his fuel when they had first come to the institute here--this was the thing that had formed the unnatural, superficial hatred directed at Nigredo. This was the thing that was utterly unreliable, because rather than the bosom buddies that could be gathered from that sentence, Albedo knew for an absolute fact that Nigredo was more lonely than he. And the only thing that was actually provided in that... Was that Rubedo had no knowledge of either of his brother's hearts.
Something Albedo would take a malicious pleasure in revealing.
Of all of them, Albedo was the one who knew best that this Rubedo was not any of the ones they had encountered. Something given through the absolute shock of seeing the two before him, and his reactions to what they had said. Albedo knew more than any. That this one had not committed any of the acts of hatred against them.
He also understood a different truth. That even if everything his twin was telling him was true, that the possibility still remained that Rubedo would end up hating them. Once the possibility had been given, once that side had been shown--once his twin had shown such a willingness to cut him down-- There was nothing that would show him otherwise.
Maybe this Rubedo didn't hate them. Maybe he loved them more than words could describe. It remained, that quite possibly one day, he wouldn't. That he would hate them more strongly than their hearts' combined beating. That he would take it upon himself to shun Nigredo and kill Albedo himself.
His mouth watered in anticipation at the thought, even as his stomach threatened to upheave itself. There was no longer any chance at tears. No longer any chance at anything, and wasn't that what he had learned?!
...Ironically, it was Nigredo that gave Rubedo a chance for redemption with Albedo. Because as Albedo remembered his previous vow to never again trust blood, he became aware once more of Nigredo at his back. At the cancellation of that vow when Albedo began to love Nigredo in full. When Albedo put his faith in Nigredo, that Nigredo would not leave. When Nigredo told him that all he was, everything, was Albedo's to do with as he pleased--and when that statement was given with absolute trust that Albedo would love him rather than harm him.
And Albedo remembered telling Nigredo that one night, that no matter what, Rubedo had once loved them. And this one possibly loved them still.
It changed nothing but everything, but things remained the same. Albedo's emotions were too high, and here was the face of his pain, his undying adoration, his loathing. And even as this one yet walked clean, it was too easy to point a finger at what had been done wrong.
He understood as well. That if Nigredo was not here, this interaction would have gone quite differently. For better or for worse, the youngest had a moderating effect on their behavior. Something he was thankful for as Rubedo came forward, because Albedo could not think of touching his twin. Could not break that careful barrier set between them, because if that was done, everything... Everything in him....
Would just break apart. He knew it. Knew it and flinched when Rubedo stormed up, pressed back against Nigredo, but only as a reaction, because in the next moment, Albedo was leaning forward, voice raising with each breath. "What kind of question is that?" he repeated, mockingly, then continued bitingly. "A valid question, beloved, from what's been shown in the past. Should we put it all behind us; place it to whims and petty indulgences?"
His tones were slipping, sounding melodic more and more, but this was no Song's sweet embrace influencing him, but the sins of the past. "You missed us," he continued without hesitation, snarling out the line. "Then let me tell you how we've been, oh twin of mine. --What happened to the others? Mm? Wasn't that what you wanted to know?"
Here, Albedo gave his first pause, humor and anger both draining from expression, energy being lost along the way. What remained was an expression close to dead, tinged with both apathy and disgust. "There's been four of you, that we encountered, once we came to this world. One was a monster in disguise, and tried to destroy Nigredo by manipulating his heart, playing with his love-- I killed it instead." A smile was given, thin and pointed. "That was the simplest of the interactions we had.
"One could not remember anything true that happened to us, one hated us beyond reckoning, and one ended up being both of those. That one we were with the longest, and he told us his age, told us that he killed Citrine, that he knew of Nigredo's fate--of his mission. That he went on to kill me, to stop my ever-beating heart from continuing another second." A sick look was passing over Albedo's face, but his momentum didn't cease. "That one ignored us, abandoned us, tried to kill me without a second's hesitation. We were worthless, Rubedo."
For the first time, absolute pain registered in Albedo's eyes, and the question put forward, meant as rhetorical, came out as literal instead, pleading. "Are you here to make us feel like that again?"